The Career path in wonderland

Time, time, time, see what’s become of me
While I looked around
For my possibilities
I was so hard to please
But look around, leaves are brown
And the sky is a hazy shade of winter

I was seated in the garden, working my way through Simon & Garfunkel’s tune on the acoustic guitar. But I was getting stuck! However hard I tried, I couldn’t get my fingers to change chords smoothly for the last line – from A7 to DMinor. Well…(I told myself), the solution is obvious. It’s clearly time to buy a new guitar!! Hee hee.

My mind strayed to the days at college, to the rock band, our performances of Pink Floyd and Guns ‘N Roses numbers, the screaming crowd, the scraps we got into at inter-college cultural fests and the eventual good-byes after graduation. Since then, I had continued to sing and play the guitar occasionally, but there was no adrenalin rush like there was during those days at college, playing with the gang.

The river had flowed on.

“Hey, nice tune”. (My nostalgia was interrupted.) It was Mr. Raj, my new neighbor. He had been watching the show from his garden.

Hello, Sir.

“Call me Raj. Nice to hear ‘Hazy shade of winter’ after all these years. You play it really well.”

(Clearly, he was being generous.)

Aw, I have heard you play the piano at home in the evenings. You really rock! As for me, I just play occasionally to keep in touch.

“You are doing well….except for that last line”

(Ouch! He had caught on to that too)

How’s things?

“Good. I am actually taking a break for a year.”

Cool…to spend more time with your kids?

“No. More like a career break.”

Oh!

“Yeah. Guess it’s time for some soul-searching.”

Really? How come?

“Well…I am trying to figure out what I’d like to do for myself. Have slogged my a$$ off, for the past 20 years and made a lot of compromises along the way. I am turning 45 this year. So, I thought it’s probably a good time to plan the next phase of my life. I want to make sure it has meaning for me this time.”

Oh.

“Do you have any advice for me? from your blog?”

Aah…I don’t know. Do you need any?

“Actually, I have already signed up with a career coach. I just wanted to hear your views anyway. I like your blog.”

There are career coaches out there?

“Yeah. This guy who is helping me is very good. He made me prepare a career plan for the next 10 years.”

That’s nice. Having a plan always makes people feel secure!

“Yeah. But hold on… what do you mean?”

Well…did you have a plan 10 years ago, which said you’ll take a career break now?

“Of course not.”

Then, why do you need a 10-year plan now?

“You have a point. But…in those days, it was just a lot of trial and error. I made a lot of mistakes in the industry and learnt the hard way. I am more mature now. ”

There’s nothing wrong with mistakes, Raj; All the mistakes and victories combined, brought you to this moment.

In fact, not just yours, but everyone else’s mistakes and victories contributed as well.

Since our work is interconnected, the results are continuously unfolding for everyone, not just you.

“Hmmm..but now, I know what works for me and what doesn’t. I didn’t have the benefit of all my experience back then.”

(I laid the guitar down on the garden seat. This conversation needed my full attention.)

 

I’d like to understand more about your needs. Set aside what your career coach said, for a moment. What does the word ‘career’ mean to you?

“Well…a career is a sequence of steps that take you towards your goals or objectives.”

Where did you get this belief from?

“I think it was from a book on careers. It had a quote from ‘Alice in Wonderland’.

When Alice meets the Cheshire cat, she asks

Would you tell me please, which way I ought to go from here?

That depends a good deal on where you want to get to, said the cat.

I don’t much care where, said Alice.

Then it doesn’t matter which way you go, said the cat.”

 

Ah, yes. The famous incomplete quote!

“What do you mean?”

All popular books on careers mention this quote. The point they want to make is “If you are not clear about the goal (the destination), you can’t work out a plan (the Way).”

“Logical, isn’t it? Then, why do you say it is incomplete?”

It doesn’t reveal the whole conversation from Lewis Carroll’s book.

“Really?”

Yeah. In fact, Alice continues..

“… So long as I get somewhere”, she added as an explanation.

“Oh, you are sure to do that”, said the cat, “if you only walk long enough”

 

(There was an awkward silence).

“I don’t understand.”

What the author was really trying to say, was this!

 

“Huh!!!”

This is the real career path in wonderland!

“This doesn’t make sense.”

It does. It does. Tell me…what happens once you reach a Goal (destination)?

“Hmmm…we celebrate…and after that, we set new goals.”

Exactly.

“Yes. But it is that way, right? Once you cross the finishing line in a race, you get ready to run the next race.”

It is only humans who invented the idea of a finishing line. Birds and trees don’t have a finishing line, Raj.

“We are more evolved than them.”

If we keep on running one race after another, how does that make us more evolved?

“You are cornering me.”

No. I am just clearing your head.

“The destination matters.”

(I looked at him pointedly).

You hit so many goals over the past 20 years. What happens when you reach a Goal (destination)?

(He took a while to ponder the question!)

(and then it hit him!)

“Oh %$^$#!!! Nothing dramatic happens once you reach a destination. Life still goes on.”

Super.

That is because – Any destination, by itself, has no special value.

There’s no issue about setting a goal or moving towards a destination. The problem starts once we start to attach more value to one destination over others.

See all destinations as they really are; arbitrary points chosen in never-ending, inter-connected journeys.

 

“Perhaps, that is why they call turning 45 the ‘mid-life crisis’.”

Nonsense. There’s nothing wrong with turning 45. We can have a crisis every year, if we are not aware of what is happening.

“And what is happening? All this is so mysterious.”

There is no mystery. It is just that we keep drawing lines to arbitrarily separate consciousness, space and time.

This problem you face now, started when you drew a line in time and said “Thus far, I have lived for others. Henceforth, I will live for myself”

The moment you drew a line, the separation began. And a crisis followed.

“What’s wrong in drawing a line to take stock of our lives?”

If we believe each of us live independent lives, we start chasing every desire that comes our way and then start to choose between different desires. We become disappointed with the result of our choices and lurch from one crisis to another.

The way out of this destructive loop is awareness. We realize that all life is a continuum. We realize that any line we draw anytime is purely arbitrary. All our lives and work are interconnected with each other. Each of our lives is unfolding perfectly according to our purpose. When we understand what that is, we can achieve great things effortlessly and help others on their way as well.

What else is a career if it’s not about living one’s purpose?

 

“What you say sounds too good to be true. This way of looking at life is new to me. I can’t do it.”

What do you mean “it’s new to you”? Have you ever lived your life before?

“Of course not.”

Your whole life is new to you, isn’t it? You are living it for the first time. Then, why bother clinging to so many concepts, as if they are truths you discovered over many lives?

“But planning and goal setting are useful tools.”

That’s the way they are meant to be used. But, what we end up doing instead is use them as truths to live our lives by.

Then, they are no longer tools.

They become cobwebs of beliefs.

And we get trapped in the web we created.

 

Refresh yourself, Raj. Use this break the right way….to clear the cobwebs you have accumulated over the years.

Sit and examine for yourself. Goals, plans and incentives needn’t drive us, as long as purpose leads us. Your deepest desire is your purpose. When you become aware of it, everything else falls in place. Your life will have real meaning – not based on artificial values you attach to some arbitrary destination or age.

“I wish I had spoken to you earlier. It’s all fitting together – the purpose, the interconnectedness, the choicelessness…though I am not able to put it in words.”

That is ok. What we understand is more important than what we can talk about.

“At least, when my kids ask me for advice on what to do with their careers after college, I know the right thing to tell them” (he grinned).

Nice thought. They deserve to know too, before they start building
their own cobwebs.

 

“Well…now that I have already signed up for a year’s break at office,….”

Yeah?

“What do you say to us pulling a band together and take on some gigs during weekends?”

Hey, what an awesome idea! That will be so much fun

“Good…I’ll set it up …and, by the way…a small suggestion… play the chords for this song in the next octave on the fretboard..it will be much easier to shift to DMinor then.”

(I picked up the guitar and tried it immediately….boy, it was an awesome tip. It worked like a breeze.)

Raj, you are a real angel. You made my day!

(He smiled and shaking his head, entered his house)

(I cheerfully carried on with the song)

Look around, the grass is high
The fields are ripe, it’s the springtime of my life
Ahhhh, seasons change with the scenery
Weaving time in a tapestry
Won’t you stop and remember me
at any convenient time….